Uninformed Comment

Derek’s car

Posted in Humour, Reminiscences and anecdotes by uninformedcomment on January 27, 2010

Let me tell you a story about my old friend Derek. He’s a great guy, but sometimes astoundingly naive.

Derek and I used to work together as programmers – it’s how we met – and one night we were working late at the office. Eventually Derek left to go home, but reappeared in a few minutes, in a rather agitated state.

Turns out he’d been driving out of the car park, then realised he’d forgotten something, got out of the car and locked the door. By hand. With the keys still in the ignition, the engine running and the headlights on.

Derek needed help.

Now I’m no motor mechanic, but Derek drove a Mk I Ford Fiesta, and an ex-owner of one myself, I knew that the locked door could be opened by using a length of stiff packing tape. I knew this because I’d once locked my keys inside (it’s actually easily done) and the RAC breakdown guy had used one.  I won’t divulge the method here for obvious reasons.

Ford Fiesta Mk I

Yeah, one of these. Piece of cake, guv.

So anyway, as luck would have it, we’d had a delivery of computers that day, conveniently packaged using exactly that stiff blue tape I needed.  I cut off a length, and we went outside to Derek’s car. Deft as a chav, I used the tape to open the door, and Derek was delighted.

“Can I keep the tape?” he asked.  Of course he could keep the tape. Thanking me profusely, he took it from me, got into the car and said:

“That’s great! I’ll keep this in the glove compartment in case it happens again!”

Good old Derek. Always planning for the future.

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